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Its Julia, wearing an oversized t-shirt and denim shorts. Oh my god, what happened? she asks. I swear, I didnt touch her! She just starting to fall over and then she did THIS! I stammered. God, that is disgusting! she said, holding her nose. How did this happen? She was drinking at a frat party earlier tonight. I saw her drunk and the frat house had a lot of college horn dogs so I thought it would be a better idea if I took her home. Then this happened. She opens the passenger car door and helps Jessica out. Jessica is still a bit fumbly and Julia cant carry her by herself. Can you give me a hand? she asks. I already came all this way and have reverse human fecal matter all over me. I figured, why not. What else can go wrong? Actually, I was afraid to ask. We stumble into Jessicas room and Julia tells me to wait outside. I wait for about 20 minutes before Julia comes back out. Oh man, we should get you cleaned up. Here, go hop in the shower and I will grab you some clothes. No, its. ’ ‘Interesting, Mr Bird, we must talk about your military service some time. I suppose we’ll all be in the Army soon. Well, I must be off. I’ve net practice tomorrow, Art, if you’d like to come along and lob a few balls at me.’ Art grins, tossing Rodge’s ball back, and looks to his Dad. Bird nods, ‘He’s free, I’ll bring him here, say same time tomorrow?’ ‘Excellent! Right-oh then, bye, see you both then.’ [*** ‘Why’d you join up, Sergeant?’ Lieutenant Arthur Edrich asked, calming down after the shock of facing death and seeing the Oberleutnant drop dead on the end of my bayonet. ‘Over a woman, Sir,’ I laughed. ‘Ah.’ Lieutenant Edrich was thoughtful. He owed me his life and we were alone in his bunker office. ‘I noticed you ignore the village girls that, er, are available.’ ‘Yes, Sir, a bit too close to home for me.’ ‘Ah, I see. Well, er, I … joined over a … man … a teacher at school … who abused and confused me.’ I’d known men in the Army that had a ‘certain preference’, the worst.
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